I know what I was thinking.
“Who’s Bethany Mota?”
NOW I know what 6 million you tube subscribers were thinking.
“Who the freak doesn’t know Bethany Mota?”
Seriously, guys. My 36th birthday only happens once and the only way to spend it is with my girls. I wonder if I had been born twelve years ago, like Kat, if I would love Bethany Mota too. An entire day to meeting her at Lenox Mall to be the top 300 to get an autograph and I still have no idea who the hell she is. Yes, I know. I am showing my age.
First of all, it was the first and maybe last time I checked them out to actually ditch school. I secretly thought that was the most exciting part but Kat’s reaction was priceless. She was pale, glaring at Lola to shut her big mouth, whispering to me to meet her outside so she wouldn’t get caught “ditching this prison.”
I am so glad she is my polar opposite. I think I wrote the notes to ditch school in perfect parent handwriting. In fact, I know I did. She reminded me nervously that it was only for emergency, and like always, I tell her to chill out! She would still have her perfect attendance record.
Along with her best friend, the girls and I ended up in a line HOURS before her appearance, to save our spot in line. I am not a line person, people. I don’t do Black Friday and God knows I don’t do Bethany What’s Her Name Mota. If I could have made my birthday, it would have been in line at a concert, which makes me wonder if I was born 12 years ago, like Kat, would I worship a You Tuber?
I still am clinging to “HELL No.”
I hope just like I wasn’t a boy band groupie, I would maintain my nonconformist self and use school ditching for more rock n roll and less “Selfies” and “Instagram.”
Goodbye 35. You were hard, mean, and life transforming.
I’m creating a colorful year, and about to watch my first Bethany Mota video to prove it.
Forget Your Perfect Offering 